MATTEO DREA$Y

Overview
Matt, AKA Matteo, AKA Drea$y, AKA The Captain, is best known for being half of the dynamic duo, Matt^2, a member of The December 1st Squad, and a former member of Official Big Boy Productions. Yet another valiant warrior fighting against That Straight Cheese, most likely for the rest of his life.

Biography
Born and raised on the streets of Oswego, IL, Matteo grew up living that thug lifestyle. Attending school and hating life K-7, Drea$y eventually befriended Ace Pilet and joined the group soon after. It was at this moment that Matteo left his brutal life of crime behind in favor of the humorous adventures to come.

Having been hit with That Straight Cheese multiple times, Matteo joined forces with other members of The Crew to destroy it. He eventually fought so much of That Straight Cheese, he was able to dodge any of its attacks with relative ease. Matteo plans on teaching others in the way of dodging That Straight Cheese in hopes of improving The Crew's morale.

Now, Matteo lives a calm and happy life at sea, aiding those who need it.

Achievements

 * Extreme evaisiveness of That Straight Cheese
 * Cofounded mattapocalypse Youtube channel
 * First in The Crew to get both married and divorced
 * Dunked on Ace Pilet's hoop and farted mid air
 * Capable of a mean Muscle Man impression
 * Can clap with one hand
 * Survived Pelzer's Honors Geometry class